epigrams & arrows

Excerpts from some of your letters:

"Well.. Here we have it, Another example of a young american unwilling to work for an honest dollar, and probably one of those who whine about illegal aliens taking jobs. If I had caught you hanging an "out of order sign" and skipping the rest of the day of work, I would have fired you on the spot."

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WTFLOLBBQ?

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"U R funny. I like ur stories.  U draw sweet!  trade me for my zine too. bye!"

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"work ethic means a job well done, and done with pride. If you have no intention of doing either one, then get the hell out. Sometimes the less than desireable jobs get passed down the chain of command. If you're the low-man on the totem pole, tough luck, that's the way the world works. If you don't like it, then you have two options: quit, or work your way up to second man on the totem pole. The idea of doing a piss-poor job, for shitty pay, in a shitty environment, is not a very good excuse. Like I said before, if you accept a job offer, do the damn job; the damn job is whatever(within bounds of legality) the boss says it is."

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"Are these stories supposed to be funny because theyre not okay? You are an asshole and your stories just show why you would be horrrible to work with.  You are the person who makes everyone elses job harder. Instead of fucking around, why dont you try to do a good job instead?"

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Lately I have been getting a lot more views to the website but a lot less feedback letters.  It seems that all the people who I so deeply offended their delicate sensibilities stopped sending me comments.  However, I am excited to tell you that I have my first real eStalker, Chang U. Bonner from Italy.  He sends me at least one email a day, sometimes 5 or even 6 but never more than 7.  Here is one of these emails from old Chang.  I get so many emails from Mr. Bonner, that I feel it is important reply to one of his emails here on the site!

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Chang U. Bonner writes:

Are you sick of viewing hot films and polishing the knob,
because you cannot find a s'e_xy girl, who would like to get laid by such a tiny phallus as yours?
Then our offer is definitely for you!
MegaDick will allow you to raise a real monster out of your little soldier and attract any hottie you wish!

And believe us, she will never complain!

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Dear Mr. Bonner,

I am surprised that you have heard of my tiny phallus all the way over there in Italy but with today's modern technological advancements, I guess it is not too surprising.  However, I have resigned myself to a life of viewing hot films and polishing the knob.  In fact, just the other day I got myself the Twin Peaks Gold Box Edition DVD set.  I highly recommend getting it!  It has the full series AND both versions of the pilot as well as a TON of extras!  You can get more information, coffee and daily weather reports at davidlynch.com.  I have also resigned myself to sticking with my girlfriend who constantly complains.  Thanks you for your thoughtful email regardless.

Best,

James Singer 

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